The Earth is Flat!

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Sooner Boomer

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Someone countered that the Earth couldn't be flat because a cat would have knocked everything off. To them I offer this poem from the book "I Could Pee on This".

nudge-cat-poem.jpg
 
Personally I feel that someone would be doing society a favour by rounding up all the flat earthers, putting them a rocket and pressing the launch button. I would even be in favour of pressurizing their compartment, full of windows of course, with just enough air for a few orbits.
 
Reminds me of a little physics secret the government doesn't want to you to know..

If you attach a buttered piece of toast (butter side up) on a cat's back, and push the cat off a table, the cat & toast will create a polarizing whirr, where the cat's need to land on it's feet will counter the toast's need to land butter side down. This will have a total & equal force, cancelling each other out, therefore creating a perpetual energy state. If harnessed properly, could end our dependence on many forms of energy..
 
Reminds me of a little physics secret the government doesn't want to you to know..

If you attach a buttered piece of toast (butter side up) on a cat's back, and push the cat off a table, the cat & toast will create a polarizing whirr, where the cat's need to land on it's feet will counter the toast's need to land butter side down. This will have a total & equal force, cancelling each other out, therefore creating a perpetual energy state. If harnessed properly, could end our dependence on many forms of energy..

Would the cat end up suspended mid-air, or would the fabric of reality bend to allow both (buttered side and cat's feed) to touch the ground at the same time?
Sounds like a risky experiment...
 
our cat has no trouble going up a tree , she does have trouble backing back down
 
I honestly would not be surprised if some folks on this forum were "flat earthers". I'm talking true believers.
And yes, I'm being serious.

s6
 
Indeed, the Earth is a Flat Plane and not a globe, sphere, or oblate spheroid.
 
My driveway is fairly flat,therefore the earth is flat..
the road to the corner store is fairly flat, although there is a slight incline going north, so the earth is flat..
when I drive to work, after the slight incline, the road is fairly straight seems flat, therefore the earth is flat
When I drive to Toronto, despite the few ups & downs, the drive seems fairly flat, therefore the earth must be flat..
although that is more of a westerly drive..
When I fly to Florida, i see a slight curve in the way off distance. so, maybe the earth isn't flat..
or maybe the plane's window is curved, giving the illusion of being round...
 
Reminds me of a little physics secret the government doesn't want to you to know..

If you attach a buttered piece of toast (butter side up) on a cat's back, and push the cat off a table, the cat & toast will create a polarizing whirr, where the cat's need to land on it's feet will counter the toast's need to land butter side down. This will have a total & equal force, cancelling each other out, therefore creating a perpetual energy state. If harnessed properly, could end our dependence on many forms of energy..

My mind is blown...
 
I will add my 2 cents to this and say the Earth is between 6 and 10,000 years old in my opinion.
 
Reminds me of a little physics secret the government doesn't want to you to know..

If you attach a buttered piece of toast (butter side up) on a cat's back, and push the cat off a table, the cat & toast will create a polarizing whirr, where the cat's need to land on it's feet will counter the toast's need to land butter side down. This will have a total & equal force, cancelling each other out, therefore creating a perpetual energy state. If harnessed properly, could end our dependence on many forms of energy..
I tried this. It wasn't easy tying the string to the toast. It was even harder tying the string round the cat. But that was trivial compared to the task of pushing the cat off the table when the cat was digging three sets of claws into the table and one set into my arm. Eventually I got the cat off the table, which merely meant that all four sets of claws were now locked into my arm.

I separated myself from the cat, and while I put a bandage and an armoured sleeve round my arm, the cat managed to free itself from the string.

When I'd cleaned the mess of butter off the floor, I tried again. It was even harder tying the string to the cat while wearing armour, but eventually I managed it. The cat again tried digging its claws into both the table and my arm. I wasn't too worried about the table being scratched; after the first attempt, there were already enough scratches on it to make it look as though it had been savaged by the Beast from 1000 Fathoms. The cat wasn't too pleased about being unable to scratch my arm, though. The thing about cats is that they don't need buttered toast to defy gravity, all they need is someone's unarmoured face within 10 feet and a really good jump. I now know where Ridley Scott got the idea for the Alien face-hugger.

For the third attempt, I wasn't taking any chances. I was now wearing a full suit of armour. This made tying the string round the cat even harder, but I'd had plenty of practice during the first two attempts. The table looked like a scale model of a WW1 battlefield. But this time, I finally triumphed. The cat, with buttered toast tied to its back, was finally pushed off the table.

It landed on its feet. The toast didn't touch the floor. At least, not until the cat ripped the string away, allowing the toast to fall off. Buttered side down, of course.
 
I tried this. It wasn't easy tying the string to the toast. It was even harder tying the string round the cat. But that was trivial compared to the task of pushing the cat off the table when the cat was digging three sets of claws into the table and one set into my arm. Eventually I got the cat off the table, which merely meant that all four sets of claws were now locked into my arm.

I separated myself from the cat, and while I put a bandage and an armoured sleeve round my arm, the cat managed to free itself from the string.

When I'd cleaned the mess of butter off the floor, I tried again. It was even harder tying the string to the cat while wearing armour, but eventually I managed it. The cat again tried digging its claws into both the table and my arm. I wasn't too worried about the table being scratched; after the first attempt, there were already enough scratches on it to make it look as though it had been savaged by the Beast from 1000 Fathoms. The cat wasn't too pleased about being unable to scratch my arm, though. The thing about cats is that they don't need buttered toast to defy gravity, all they need is someone's unarmoured face within 10 feet and a really good jump. I now know where Ridley Scott got the idea for the Alien face-hugger.

For the third attempt, I wasn't taking any chances. I was now wearing a full suit of armour. This made tying the string round the cat even harder, but I'd had plenty of practice during the first two attempts. The table looked like a scale model of a WW1 battlefield. But this time, I finally triumphed. The cat, with buttered toast tied to its back, was finally pushed off the table.

It landed on its feet. The toast didn't touch the floor. At least, not until the cat ripped the string away, allowing the toast to fall off. Buttered side down, of course.

I hope you have a lot of neosporin. That's right up there with giving a cat a bath stories I've seen.
 
Reminds me of a little physics secret the government doesn't want to you to know..

If you attach a buttered piece of toast (butter side up) on a cat's back, and push the cat off a table, the cat & toast will create a polarizing whirr, where the cat's need to land on it's feet will counter the toast's need to land butter side down. This will have a total & equal force, cancelling each other out, therefore creating a perpetual energy state. If harnessed properly, could end our dependence on many forms of energy..

This only works with female cats. The Male cats throw the whole contraption out of balance!
 
Fact is, I have written several HPR trajectory simulation and accelerometer analysis programs based on The Flat Earth model. They all seem to work well enough...

-Larry (You say Ellipse; I say Parabola. Let's call the whole thing off!) C.
 
If only we could send an honest man, like, say ... John Glenn, into space and get him back, he could clear this whole this up. Oh, well....
 
The thing that really gets me, with eh Apollo hoaxers, is that they believe they were faked. yet, wouldn't Russia have been the first, and with all their might, to have proven it a fake?! What would they have to gain by allowing eh hoax to remain unproven?
 
The thing that really gets me, with eh Apollo hoaxers, is that they believe they were faked. yet, wouldn't Russia have been the first, and with all their might, to have proven it a fake?! What would they have to gain by allowing eh hoax to remain unproven?

Yeah, the whole point of the moon race was for bragging rights, and you're telling me the USSR wouldn't have smeared our faces in it?
 
The thing that really gets me, with eh Apollo hoaxers, is that they believe they were faked. yet, wouldn't Russia have been the first, and with all their might, to have proven it a fake?! What would they have to gain by allowing eh hoax to remain unproven?
Hoaxers really have to ignore a lot of facts in order to remain convinced of their position. The reason you gave is one of the 3 reasons that I give, that so far no hoaxer has been able to successfully argue against, on any of the other places I've discussed it (YouTube, Reddit, etc.).

1. Russia was watching and listening, and more importantly tracking, and would have known if it was faked. They were in an incredibly expensive race with us which the entire world was following. If they'd had ANY evidence that the landing had been faked, such as the radio signals coming from satellites instead of the CSM, LM on the way down, LM on the surface, LM on the way back up, etc., or such as evidence found by any of their spies which have been confirmed to have existed, they would have loved nothing more than to embarrass the USA publicly and show that Communism is better than our Republic. But they didn't do any of that, they behaved like a country defeated in the race to the moon.

2. 100,000s of people would have had to be in on the cover up, but even if it was just 1,000 people it's just crazy to think that nobody would ever have said anything about it. In all the years since then none of the people deeply involved that passed away had any dying words to clear their conscience, or left behind any documents about the cover up, nobody accidentally let something slip, no secrets were revealed by disgruntled employees, there haven't been a dozen mysterious "suicides" of people that were about to give interviews, etc. It's not a secret that could have lasted this long with this many people in on it.

3. Major movie studios, using state of the art special effects for the late 60s and early 70s, have made plenty of movies about space and moon landings. The effects all look horrible and fake and nothing like what we saw on the actual footage. Today the footage could have been faked with CGI like what is used in current space movies, but back then it just wasn't possible. The only way to get the footage that looks that legit, back then, was to go to the moon. They filmed this moon footage on location. Not faked.

Hoaxers completely ignore all that and come up with other "facts" to explain their position. Some days its more fun than others to debate them.
 
I know someone who thinks the World Bank really controls the whole world and all the governments; so any time you use the "Russia would have ..." card, he says that the World Bank kept Russia silent by threatening to drive them into financial ruin. It never ends.
 
That's what I mean, they have to work hard in order to ignore facts. They make up World Bank control in order to ignore the obvious action Russia would have taken.

The nuclear arms race DID drive the Soviet Union into financial ruin and it collapsed, and even after that none of the secret proof that the Russians supposedly would have had came out.
 
Just to resurrect this with an update......


[video=youtube;4ylYvNnP1rg]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ylYvNnP1rg[/video]
 
This has become the most epic internet troll ever. I wonder if the source was ever tracked down and given an award lol
 
Not all of it is troll, or people who are just bored. I volunteer at a youth center, and there is a young man that also volunteers there who is flat-earth for religious reasons. I have read the passage in Psalms he points to justify his belief - very poetic section with the words "pillars of the earth" - easily poetic license for the very natural phenomena that make life on this planet so interesting. Not exactly where I would go for a literal description of a physical structure. The young man left a book he was reading out on an end table, so I picked it up. Book was a supposed scriptural proof of flat earth. Published in 1901, and as far as I could tell, never updated, although recently printed with a nice paper-back cover. Quick flip through findings: Not really a lot of what I would call an argument from scripture, no math, not much science, no diagrams. The scientific topics discussed were lightly-grounded in writings and discussions of the 1850s - 1880s.
 
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