Neighborhood watch? OMG-LMFAO

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hornet driver

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So, over the last few evenings, a few of the cars in our complex were vandalized. Not really vandalized but rummaged through. All were unlocked and a couple of nights ago mine was rifled through. Yea, my fault, I didn't lock it. Nothing missing--no tools--walkie talkie--nothin! I figured it was kids looking for change. My buddy upstairs had the same thing happen a few days prior. It turns out , this has been going on for several evenings in the last two weeks. I was a bit surprised since it had gotten so cold out side in the last couple of days. The Police were putting a couple extra drive throughs in the complex but it didn't seem to make a difference.
We live in a "really" nice gated complex but the back of the property is open to a bike path that goes over a creek--more on that later. My bud upstairs and a couple of other neighbors got together the next night over more than a few beers and came up with a plan---ummm---trap! Yea ,I know, don't get involved--not gonna happen!. Best guess , it was kids, and not from our complex. We were able to narrow the time line down to between 1am and 3am .
So, what do four old ex military guys do in the cold with cell phones, some para chord,a couple of cans of landscape paint, a strobe light and a can of spray foam? I'll let you know tomorrow if you want. BUT I gotta tell ya, it felt good and we LOFAO after! BTW--No animals or criminals were--ummm- injured---there might have been a face plant.
 
I think all of us wanna know...

Paracord, paint, spray foam, a strobe light and a few ex military guys with cell phones and beer? I think I get the picture.
For the sake of the OP, (just in case there is, you know, any civil or criminal liability), I don't wanna know and I think it's best left to the rest of our imagination ;)
 
I'm sure nothing happened. But, *hypothetically* maybe you could relate the possibilities ;)
 
Our neighborhood periodically has reports of unlocked cars being riffled. And they appear to be getting bolder...striking even if lights were left on or if cars were pulled closer to the house, etc. Neighborhood patrol cars doesn't seem to do anything. Some people talked about getting motion activated security cameras or similar, but no follow through. The suspicion is either that it is high school or junior high kids getting up early to walk to school (and searching for lunch money) or else local drug addicts looking for loose change. Nothing seems to be taken, except for loose change. Hence, the thought that it is kids.
 
First--the beer was the night before---we were stone sober the next night. Second--we really didn't think we would catch anyone but we said" what the hell , this could be fun, and cold" and yes if it looked like a bad situation--multiple targets--drive through- we would call the police first. OK. All that said, we laid our plan. The property is fenced on three sides. The back side backs up to a small river/creek with a bike path over it leading to other complexes a few hundred yards away beyond a tree line.It's up hill from there to my complex with a green area about 100 yards long from the creek to the building. GOT THE PICTURE? We figured it was a couple of kids. None of us wanted to get into anything physical---hmmm--what to do? We had to catch them in the act--startle them-- and scare the snot out of them or at least never cross that creek again. We figured we could post two guys at the tree line to let us know if someone came onto the property the other two would sit in a car near the "bait car"When my car was broken into, it was right in front of my building--in the light-next to the walkway--pretty bold huh?? stupid? We parked my buddy's Honda in that same spot. We would sit in a car two spaces down and wait.

Just coming out of our car and surprising them would have little effect. They would just run away--what fun is that? My friend is an avid hiker and survival camper. During the beer fest planning night he pulled out a couple of strobe lights--PERFECT-- I said I could make a trip switch for it--let's put it in the glove box---that took about 30 minutes the next morning and after a couple test runs we were ready to go. Our weapons of choice would be landscape paint--that bright green and orange stuff. The punishment phase would come later at the creek--para chord and foam!!!

The whole idea sounded like a bad one with no chance of success but it sounded like fun.

Two guys set up at the path, hidden in the woods, and would call us, in the car, when someone came across at some ridiculous time in the overnight hours in the cold! They had tied some para chord to a tree and would block/ trip up the would be thieves on their way out by pulling it across the path. NUTTIN BUT FUN!

We settled into to what might be a long cold night---about 20 minutes into it, here comes some nice young man down the path dressed in black sweats, black knit cap and gloves--the call was made--this guy should be a secret agent! There's only two entry points to the property between a couple of buildings and we had eyes on those. Sure enough , here comes junior. He stopped at the edge of the lot and checked out the area and proceeded to check the drivers door of every car working as he worked his way to us.

The complex is arranged as a circle and we lost sight of him so I got out of the car and spotted him coming around the corner and up the hill--back to the car--call the other guys to be ready---wait for it--wait for it. OH LOOK. the door is unlocked on this nice Honda--hmmmm---let's take a look at what's inside. Quietly we got out of the car and were standing behind him when he opened the glove box .

NOTE TO SELF: strobe lights are really bright when your night vision is in play.

I really didn't think the human body could move so fast and hit so many objects at one time. When he finally made it out of the drivers door he turned and we hit him crotch to face with paint---the next day was spent getting over spray off the car but well worth it. The would be thief took off running.

He ran across the parking lot towards the dog walk area but hit the back of a pick up on his way--ouch--a few feet later he missed the curb and face planted in the gravel--that was a down hill fall--OMG! I have tears in my eyes I'm laughing so bad. This reminds me of the good old days when we would haze pledges in the frat.

He gathered himself and bolted to the exit point------it seems there is some truth in movies about the girl running and the bad guy just walking behind them and catching them---we're too old to run, OK , maybe a trot, make the call.

Junior had a good head of steam up going down the hill to the bike path and managed to fall one more time before he found the shin level para chord at the other end--FACE PLANT 2-- by the time we got there, one of the guys was sitting on him and the other was ready with the --you got it--spray foam---I had to call the dogs off. They were gonna foam him where it really mattered. In the end , every pocket got a nice dose of foam as well as inside the gloves--still on --and about that knit cap. By the time he got home it should have been about the size of a watermelon.

Guys, don't do this kind of stuff--a lot more can go wrong than right--BUT, Oh My God, my ribs still hurt from laughing!!!! ---and to the guys involved---

SEMPER FI--GO ARMY--FLY NAVY
 
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Wow....i wonder how long it took him to get the gloves and hat off...anybody who's ever had Great Stuff get away from you knows what a struggle that would be. Hope it was some kid who had to try to explain that to his mom
 
As a great man once said: "I love it when a plan comes together!"

:)

(I hope the brat learned a lesson, that might be too much to hope for...)
 
Truth is stranger than fiction. Or wait, wasn't this the plot from the movie, The Expendables 2?
 
Today, somewhere in DFW, a kid was being mercilously harrased by his friends for his new "haircut".
 
Sooooo....PIX OR IT DIDN'T HAPPEN!! ;)

Seriously, it'd be great to turn video/photos into the cops.
 
Yea, no pics and not even a thought about that. I will get some pics out of the strobe trap later. I gotta tell ya, the whole thing could have gone south or not even happen. I'm just watching out for the bald kid in the area. I like the sound of " SUX TO BE YOU"
 
This is one of those things that I wish I could have been there to witness and help with... However, I would have insisted that shoes, socks, pants legs, as well as the front and back of his boxers (or briefs) get the foam treatment too.

Also, with the strobe in the eyes, it's likely that any attempt at pulling, let alone aiming, a weapon would have likely resulted in an accident where he slipped and breaks both his arms, nose, both legs, eye sockets, and cracks a couple of ribs when he tried to use it.
 
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Too funny. Great plan & deployment. Reminds me of the time me and a friend were sitting on my 2nd floor porch at around 0230 hours, waiting to see the MIR fly over. We turned off/unscrewed all lights we could in our vicinity. We were sipping some Crown as it was a chilly fall AM, when we noticed a young adult checking to see if any vehicle doors were open. My friend, a cat lover/owner had a decent laser key chain. Since the laser was not as strong as a weapon sight laser, we waited and hoped he would work his way to the cars right under our perch. Sure enough he did. To be honest I thought the chances were low that he would think it was a weapon sight when he saw the red dot on the car in front of his face. Well my friend did a great job by placing the dot about a foot to the side of his head and moved it slowly towards his head. Wow! He moved so fast he couldn't get out of hi own way, 1st stumbling & falling backwards, then zig zagging the next 50' before making a bee line to and around the corner of the unit across the parking lot. Watching the MIR was almost anticlimactic! There are some aspects of apartment living I miss!
 
Please don't ruin it and tell us this was all made up!

I felt like I was right there in the moment reading your report. What fun!
 
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