English Is Weird...

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I will state that for the best designed method of writing has got to be Korean. The writing system was designed, at the order of a king, by scientists. Each character represents a single syllable. There is the initial consonant sound, the vowel sound, and the final consonant sound. Since an initial consonant sound or a final consonant sound are not found in every syllable, there's a mark to indicate that. As such, if you know all the symbols of the consonants and vowels, as well as the way they sound in Korean, you can pronounce every word in the language, even if you don't what the word is.

The remarkable thing is... This system was designed in the 15th Century.
True . . . Most of the time. There are those annoying instances where two consonants together can change the pronunciation. But rules apply, and they follow them.
 
Tagalog has a poetic, sing/song aspect to it. They joke in the Philippines that if you speak English long enough, you'll eventually get a nose bleed. After giving a 30 hour training, I can say that's mostly accurate.
 
"You park a car in a driveway, and you drive a car in a parkway." George Carlin
.
Also from George Carlin:

"Remember: you can prick your finger, but you can't finger..."

(I find it's always a tad funnier if you have to work for it a bit)
 
This is my favorite pun:

Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.

I'm also in total awe that Bill Watterson could think this one up:

"How many boards would the Mongols hoard if the Mongol hordes got bored?"
 
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I Before E: Except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters drinking protein shakes. Weird.
I remember the poem from fresh high school English....
I before E, except after "c"
Or when sounded like "a", as in neighbor and weigh
But their, weird, either
foreign, seize, neither
Leisure, forfeit, height
are exceptions spelled right.
 
Through, rough, and trough don't rhyme but pony and bologna do.

English IS weird...
 
BTW I looked up the lyrics to Rock a Bye Baby and the part about "when the bough breaks" appears to have changed.
I remember "When the bough breaks the cradle will fall, and down will come baby cradle and all".
But now it's "If the bough breaks, the cradle will fall, Mama will catch you, cradle and all."
I grew up with "down will come baby cradle and all" and was not traumatized by it.
PC to the extreme? Sheesh.

Err, yes it does :). But not if you are talking about what you shoot arrows with 🙃.
Yeah, I misread Charles's post. Thought he was referring to the former not the latter.
But depends on how you pronounce "bow" is my point.
 
BTW I looked up the lyrics to Rock a Bye Baby and the part about "when the bough breaks" appears to have changed.
I remember "When the bough breaks the cradle will fall, and down will come baby cradle and all".
But now it's "If the bough breaks, the cradle will fall, Mama will catch you, cradle and all."
I grew up with "down will come baby cradle and all" and was not traumatized by it.
PC to the extreme? Sheesh.


Yeah, I misread Charles's post. Thought he was referring to the former not the latter.
But depends on how you pronounce "bow" is my point.


Wow.

Apparently my world knowledge has slipped.
 
"The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words; on occasion, English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."
- James D. Nicoll
 
The current version of The Guardian Style Guide (and others) declare a possessive apostrophe and corresponding 's' is used after all names ending in 's' unless historical or reverential.

James's shoes

Thomas's socks

Jesus' sandals
So, if the Thomas in question was the Apostle Thomas, or some other famous Thomas, then it would be "Thomas' socks" (assuming that he wore socks, of course). But if it was my nephew (who goes by TJ, but I digress), then it would be "Thomas's socks"?

Weird.
 
So, if the Thomas in question was the Apostle Thomas, or some other famous Thomas, then it would be "Thomas' socks" (assuming that he wore socks, of course). But if it was my nephew (who goes by TJ, but I digress), then it would be "Thomas's socks"?

Weird.

Yes.

That guy Jesus who has a birthday tomorrow: Jesus' sandles.

Any other Jesus (with varying pronunciation), Jesus's sandles.

It is weird. I agree.
 
Yes.

That guy Jesus who has a birthday tomorrow: Jesus' sandles.

Any other Jesus (with varying pronunciation), Jesus's sandles.

It is weird. I agree.
I work with an international team. Over 50% of them are in Madrid, Spain. One day we had an outage and the guy on call was named Jesus (pronounced Hey-Zeus) The boss based in San Francisco made a huge deal on the next call that Jesus saved us all. Nothing better to get 500 people rolling all at once.
 
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