Don't look now, but the sky is falling

The News headlines always make me look. Now the magnetic field is weakening faster than expected. I wonder what tax the powers that be will come up with to fix this problem?

Earth's magnetic field is weakening fast than expected

Blah...blah...blah...

David

Magnetic Credits. Just like Carbon Credits for Global Warming.

Astronot said:

. Now the magnetic field is weakening faster than expected.

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Just think of the implications of when the poles flip... That would mean Vermont would be in the Deep South.:lol:

More and more people are wearing headphones and earbuds to listen to music from phones, MP3 players and other portable devices. Those headphones and earbuds all contain magnets. It can't be a coincidence that the Earth's magnetic field is changing right at the time that personal use of magnets has increased. Headphones and earbuds will therefore have to be taxed to save the world.

Observe the globe in that article. See how America's magnetic field is blue, i.e. weakening, whereas there's a big pink area near Madagascar indicating a strengthening field. Obviously terrorists in Madagascar are stealing America's magnetic field. The next war on terror will therefore be waged against Madagascar.

adrian said:

... whereas there's a big pink area near Madagascar indicating a strengthening field. Obviously terrorists in Madagascar are stealing America's magnetic field. The next war on terror will therefore be waged against Madagascar.

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Perhaps it's something else ...





I LIKE TO MOVE IT MOVE IT!



Greg

It’s all those magnets in all those wind energy towers that’s causing the problem.
We should tear them all down.

Actually the end will come when the weight imbalance in the Northern Hemisphere due to all the stored back issues of “National Geographic” causes the Earth to tip over leaving the poles at what is now the equator.

We're all doomed. I think its time the government kept us all locked up permanantly plugged into a medi-vac computer to keep us all safe

A tinfoil hat should keep you safe.

The article I read said that the poles flip every 10,000 years or so. This just happens to be the first time in recorded history that it happened.

Yes, compasses will now point south, and your bath water will spin the other way when you pull the drain plug.

Bat-mite said:

...and your bath water will spin the other way when you pull the drain plug.

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This reason alone is why I would flush the toilet hundreds of times...

AcidPaintball said:

This reason alone is why I would flush the toilet hundreds of times...

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Every time you flush the toilet, the swirling water saps the Earth of some of its spin. All this excess flushing is going to result in the Earth losing its rotation, and we're going to end up overcooked on one side, like a burger on a grill that never gets flipped. Keep your flushing to a minimum. Better yet, learn to poop in the woods, like a bear.

AcidPaintball said:

This reason alone is why I would flush the toilet hundreds of times...

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While sailing across the equator many moons ago, a couple of us poured a bucket of water down a funnel, just to see it.....

Well crap! Now I have to take all the rare-earth magnets in the World Domination Machine back to Radio Shack and exchange them for new ones with the poles reversed. That sucks! Don't laugh! This World Domination thing isn't as easy as it looks. Until we convert every politician, lawmaker and enforcement agency members into rocketeers, we'll never be safe!

(And two words: Coriolis Effect)

fyrwrxz said:

Well crap! Now I have to take all the rare-earth magnets in the World Domination Machine back to Radio Shack and exchange them for new ones with the poles reversed. That sucks! Don't laugh! This World Domination thing isn't as easy as it looks. Until we convert every politician, lawmaker and enforcement agency members into rocketeers, we'll never be safe!

(And two words: Coriolis Effect)

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“So what are we going to do tomorrow Brain?”

“Same thing we did today Pinky. Try and take over the world”

fyrwrxz said:

(And two words: Coriolis Effect)

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Yep.

ThirstyBarbarian said:

A tinfoil hat should keep you safe.

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This is a lie.

https://web.archive.org/web/20100708230258/https://people.csail.mit.edu/rahimi/helmet/

DJDeadParrot said:

This is a lie.

https://web.archive.org/web/20100708230258/https://people.csail.mit.edu/rahimi/helmet/

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Science! Bah!

T-Rex said:

While sailing across the equator many moons ago, a couple of us poured a bucket of water down a funnel, just to see it.....

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The "stuff drains in opposite directions on the other side of the equator" fact... is not true. Things drain based more on the direction that the stuff was poured in to begin with, and the shape of the drain itself.

The rotation of the Earth has zero effect on toilets and bathtubs. It's only significant on macro events such as weather patterns, hurricanes, etc.

Mushtang said:

The "stuff drains in opposite directions on the other side of the equator" fact... is not true. Things drain based more on the direction that the stuff was poured in to begin with, and the shape of the drain itself.

The rotation of the Earth has zero effect on toilets and bathtubs. It's only significant on macro events such as weather patterns, hurricanes, etc.

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Well now you've ruined my bucket list item of taking a crap in Australia. Thank you very much.

Mushtang said:

The "stuff drains in opposite directions on the other side of the equator" fact... is not true. Things drain based more on the direction that the stuff was poured in to begin with, and the shape of the drain itself.

The rotation of the Earth has zero effect on toilets and bathtubs. It's only significant on macro events such as weather patterns, hurricanes, etc.

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Aw, don't ruin all the fun! Why, people have spent millions going to Australia just to see if it goes the other way.

After the magnetic poles flip, which way will a compass point as you flush it down an Australian toilet?

ThirstyBarbarian said:

After the magnetic poles flip, which way will a compass point as you flush it down an Australian toilet?

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Bee-ah. That's Australian for beer.

I Googled "Australian toilet" and the picture of the big spider is reason enough not to ever go to Australia.

Mushtang said:

Bee-ah. That's Australian for beer.

I Googled "Australian toilet" and the picture of the big spider is reason enough not to ever go to Australia.

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Dang! I just Googled it too! Giant spiders, toads and snakes in Australian toilets! You never know what might bite you "down under!"