Gift idea for wife- yay or nay, rocket related

Hi all- I'm on a fence, and need some advice. Many of you seem to either be blessed with or are yourselves a Rocket-loving Wife...my wife is terrific in so many ways, but has an "active disinterest" in rocketry. She doesn't begrudge me of it, which I love her for endlessly, but she also doesn't have many hobbies of her own. She's been to a few club launches, and was a great cheerleader for my cert attempts, but mostly she just sees it as "silly boy stuff", something I do to get some alone time in the shop. I'm toying with the idea of getting her a 3 or 4FNC Loc kit- nothing fancy, something that is sturdy, easy to build, and easy to fly on as small as an F or a G. My idea is that I would be happy to help coach her on how to build it, but I will not do it for her, no way no how. It's then up to her to either start it, or leave it in the closet.
Obviously you don't know my wife, but surely someone here has tried something similar, and either it worked, and it becomes a team hobby, or it doesn't, and things go back to normal. I suppose if the situation were completely wrong, it could backfire, but I am not quite sure I can see that happening here (worst case is she says, "Oh great, you bought me something for you...", but I explain that away by saying it doesn't matter to me if she leaves it in the bag for ever).
Stupid idea?

I think it's a good idea. Nothing to lose, really. I did the same thing with my girlfriend. She'd go to launches and like watching, but had no interest other than that. I bought her an Estes Partizon and she built it herself with my oversight. Before too long she said she wanted something bigger. So, I'm getting her a 4" Madcow Batray that she'll be getting her L1 with.

Oh boy...... I'm on the fence with this one. When you describe her as having an 'active disinterest' in rocketry, that gives me pause. If you do go with the idea, I might suggest the timing be random, and not related to a traditional gift giving occasion (Christmas, birthday, anniversary, etc). That way, if she's not excited about it, you haven't done any damage to an expectation of something different for one of those occasions. Don't know how long you have been married, but I would encourage you to 'go with your gut'. My wife and I hit our 20th anniversary this past May. She's been very supportive of my rocketry, enjoys camping out at a launch once in a while, and was excited to make my cert flights a fun family event. However, I know that me buying her a rocket as a gift wouldn't go over well. Good luck!

Go with sparkles.

A Binder Thug, but throw away the T, so you can give her a Hug

yes, stupid idea. Buy her something she wants. If she wants to play with rockets then she will let you know. And don't think you will get away with buying her an appliance or new vacuum.

Would probably not be good to do it as something when other gifts are given. As no matter how much you might describe it as an "extra gift", it subconsciously it may come across as something in place of something else she might have wanted.

Avoiding other occasions like any time near her birthday or anniversary

Perhaps in mid-January (avoiding mid-February!).

I like rockets, a lot, but I love my wife.

Let her know she is loved, focus completely on her when picking the gift, and from what you have said, it won't be rocket related.

In fact, here is a suggestion......................

Take her away for a weekend getaway, to the special little spot she has always talked about. Splurge and buy her several things she shows interest in from the local gift shops.

Here is the hard part, buy nothing for yourself, and don't even talk about rockets!, no TRF, nothing for the whole weekend.

Focus on her, and remember why you married her..........................I don't know you, I don't know her, but I promise this will work.

It will be the best gift she ever got, and will pay dividends to you rocket related, big time in the future...

Just my 2 cents.

Active disinterest - I'm assuming here but she is just coming to support you because she is a sweet wife. If she hasn't expressed interest in building a rocket - In her eyes this would be a project for her. You could always buy extra kits for you and let her build one after you ask her if she wants one - George has a good point - doing this around Christmas and Valentine's Day is sure do have I'll affects lol.

My wife is very supportive and has zero interest in building and even lower interest in having me "teach" her how to build. But she wants to talk and be included on the paint schemes of the rocket.

Launch day when she comes, she enjoys just being outside and not working on anything.

I wanted to do the same thing - but I'm learning more about my wife even after 20 years.
That's my 2 cents

Others have expressed it well so I won't repeat except to say, what you are planning would not work in any way, shape or form with my wife.

I asked my wife her opinion she is just like you describe your wife. She said "No. At best it will go unused and be a crappy gift, at worst it will be a sign of you being pushy and not listening to her."

That's an easy question. If she is not interested in rocketry then she doesn't want a rocket for Christmas. If she is like my wife then clothes or jewelry would be a better idea.

I think your own words... "active disinterest" should tell you everything you need to know. This is probably not a good plan.

If you want to try it, get a nice Estes started kit for a few bucks and drop it in her Christmas stocking on top of everything else you already planned to get her. If that goes well, and she builds it, and is interested in flying it, and actually goes to a launch with you....

THEN you might think about something bigger.

My wife has an "active disinterest" in rocketry (even less than yours) but she encourages me to go to launches and take rocket vacations for NARAM, etc. But buying her a rocket, especially a rocket that she would view as "expensive" would be a really BAD idea.

YMMV

This is great advice, everyone! I will put this one back on the rickety-shelf of questionable ideas in the back of my mind. Thanks!!

Never mind. I see you have made up your mind and there is no reason to pile on.

I may be too late for soopirV, but for anyone else who is thinking along these lines, I find that the answers to these questions come quickly when you reverse the scenario.

Suppose your wife were really into quilting, and she has been trying to get you interested, but you just aren't.

Now, imagine it's Christmas morning, and there is a nicely wrapped present for you under the tree, and you are hoping/wondering, "Is it an altimeter? A retainer? A new set of 38mm hardware?"

And you tear open the box, and it's a set of quilting hooks and yarn. What is your reaction? "Wow, she really loves me! I think I am going to take a new interest in quilting!" Or, is it more like, "Gosh ... what a disappointment. What do I say to her? She knows I don't like quilting...."

If i ever gave my wife a rocket, it darned well better come with a diamond tennis bracelet in the payload bay.

Bat-mite said:

I may be too late for soopirV, but for anyone else who is thinking along these lines, I find that the answers to these questions come quickly when you reverse the scenario.

Suppose your wife were really into quilting, and she has been trying to get you interested, but you just aren't.

Now, imagine it's Christmas morning, and there is a nicely wrapped present for you under the tree, and you are hoping/wondering, "Is it an altimeter? A retainer? A new set of 38mm hardware?"

And you tear open the box, and it's a set of quilting hooks and yarn. What is your reaction? "Wow, she really loves me! I think I am going to take a new interest in quilting!" Or, is it more like, "Gosh ... what a disappointment. What do I say to her? She knows I don't like quilting...."

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Not too late at all, and great analogy...I've reconsidered!

Bat-mite said:

I may be too late for soopirV, but for anyone else who is thinking along these lines, I find that the answers to these questions come quickly when you reverse the scenario.

Suppose your wife were really into quilting, and she has been trying to get you interested, but you just aren't.

Now, imagine it's Christmas morning, and there is a nicely wrapped present for you under the tree, and you are hoping/wondering, "Is it an altimeter? A retainer? A new set of 38mm hardware?"

And you tear open the box, and it's a set of quilting hooks and yarn. What is your reaction? "Wow, she really loves me! I think I am going to take a new interest in quilting!" Or, is it more like, "Gosh ... what a disappointment. What do I say to her? She knows I don't like quilting...."

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Hahaha - John very funny, but this actually happened to me as a teenager. My name was on the wrong package and I opened it ....wow, awkward silence then" uhh, thank you?" Man was that uncomfortable - everyone else got a kick out of it, but I was like " quilting book? This person REALLY doesn't know me"

Nick@JET said:

Hahaha - John very funny, but this actually happened to me as a teenager. My name was on the wrong package and I opened it ....wow, awkward silence then" uhh, thank you?" Man was that uncomfortable - everyone else got a kick out of it, but I was like " quilting book? This person REALLY doesn't know me"

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I gave my wife some really boneheaded presents early in our marriage. Lesson learned. Now the big embarrassment at Christmas is when our kids get something from a relative, and frown and toss it over their shoulders. I think we've got them straightened out on that one.

mrichhicrim (sp)

That is actually a great idea!!

I've got a super alpha that I've been wondering what to do with it. Now I know, Paint it pink and fill it with diamonds!!!

What everyone else said above. That said, if you do want to go through with the plan, you could buy an "extra" kit that's not too expensive (PSII?) and put it on your shelf. Round about March, you go to your wife and say that you have some kits gathering dust and it's getting to be the end of the build season, and would she like to build one for herself?

For the record, my wife has said that she has no interest in anything rocketry except painting and finding them after flight. She is a wizard at both.

bought my wife a mini magg, payload bay, and an I600R to get her L1 in style.... after her bringing it up, and talking to her about it.

It sat for two years before I just built the kit and flew the motor in something else. She was trying, but admitted she just had no interest.


You're not going to spark any interest, and she's just going to see it as selfish. If you want tp share an interest.... pick something you both already like and get more involved in it. Turns out, my wife LOVES shooting. go figure.

soopirV said:

This is great advice, everyone! I will put this one back on the rickety-shelf of questionable ideas in the back of my mind. Thanks!!

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GOOD FOR YOU!!

soopirV, consider this sometime..... after the holidays. And I really wish I'd said this before, doesn't matter that you put the original idea aside.

Just let you wife know that you'd be glad to get her a rocket kit to build, and would give her support in how to build it. So that she could fly it at some launches. But let her know it's her decision.... you didn't want to give her one out of the blue that she'd feel pressure to build or awkward in not doing anything with.

If she is not interested, then that's that.

And if she would want to build one, then she could be involved in choosing what kind of model, whether an A-C powered model, D/E powered, or F/G. Perhaps she might prefer to look thru a catalog or some online models, as there may be something she'd find more interest in building than anything else, within the lower end of the Skill Level range so it would still be something "easy" as a first model.

mrichhcirm said:

If i ever gave my wife a rocket, it darned well better come with a diamond tennis bracelet in the payload bay.

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How about.... an additional ring?

Bat-mite said:

I may be too late for soopirV, but for anyone else who is thinking along these lines, I find that the answers to these questions come quickly when you reverse the scenario.

Suppose your wife were really into quilting, and she has been trying to get you interested, but you just aren't.

Now, imagine it's Christmas morning, and there is a nicely wrapped present for you under the tree, and you are hoping/wondering, "Is it an altimeter? A retainer? A new set of 38mm hardware?"

And you tear open the box, and it's a set of quilting hooks and yarn. What is your reaction? "Wow, she really loves me! I think I am going to take a new interest in quilting!" Or, is it more like, "Gosh ... what a disappointment. What do I say to her? She knows I don't like quilting...."

Click to expand...

As I was reading this thread, I was thinking of writing the same thing, and the exact example I was planning to use was QUILTING!

soopirV said:

This is great advice, everyone! I will put this one back on the rickety-shelf of questionable ideas in the back of my mind. Thanks!!

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I definitely think you made the right choice.

I also think the idea came from a good place, even if it probably would have not worked out well. It sounds like you just want to share something you enjoy with your wife --- nothing wrong with that. But you can't give someone else a hobby. My wife would absolutely never be interested in actually building a rocket. She would hate it. But she does have fun at a launch (up to a point). A couple of years ago, I was building some rockets as gifts for other people, and she appreciated the time I spent on them and thought they turned out very nice. So I built, painted and decorated one for her too, using colors and designs I knew she would like. She enjoyed the gesture and loved how it turned out. It wasn't Christmas or any other holiday, just a little gift. She's flown it maybe twice, and it may never be flown again, but that's fine. I never expected or hoped to make her a rocketeer. The reason she likes it is it's something I spent time making for her.

georgegassaway said:

How about.... an additional ring?

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Well, if you tilt your head to the right, it looks kinda like a fancy toilet and chances are they'll see that before they see the spaceship.

This can go the other way, too: unless you happen to be a pro at your SO's hobby, assuming they have some expertise it may be unwise to gift them something directly related unless a) they've told you what they want, and why or b) you are able to obtain enlightened outside council.

YMMV, etc.

Would not be good for my wife. She would buy me a diamond necklace for the following Christmas.